Beltaine Blessings

I love the sabbats and esbats, i love the full, new and void moons as well. Heck i just love the cycles of life and the planets and correlating them to my own life. Sure, i'm first to admit sometimes i do not appreciate the astrological influences on myself nor my children, sometimes they are just downright inconvenient and painful, but i also appreciate they are very necessary in our Spiritual growth and development. I know i don't want to ever be reborn and live my life as a human again - so i am getting it right this time!!! LOL

Beltane is the coming together of the God and the Goddess when their fertility is at a peak. In lay terms, it is a time for Pagans to place out into the Universe their deepest desires and move forward into making these dreams a reality. It is not enough to simply "wish", you must listen to the inner guidance that is sent to you and make it happen. The wish, the pure intent, is the most critical part of alchemy, as much as letting it go into the stratosphere and believing it will come back to you when all steps are completed.

However, a lot of people are wary of practicing their magick at this time as well. The veil between this world and the Summerlands is at it's thinnest (just like Samhain) and the Gods sometimes like to be a bit clever in how things manifest - the words "be careful what you wish for" ring loudly in my ears when i wrote this out. It was this time i was heavily wishing for me to take control of my life, and in many many ways i have! This time last year i wanted to be in a job i could flourish in and fed my need to socialise and be creative and supportive - with a couple of false starts, we are almost there!!!

It also explains why i have been visited by many passed relatives this last week, both mine and others, to give loving support and guidance to myself (and others) in the current predicaments we find ourselves in.

But, now what - what is it that i want more than anything!! This is where i get stuck you see. I'd be one of the beauty pageant barbies wishing for "World Peace" or "Whirled Peas", whatever takes your fancy at the time!! I was raised to believe that one should never ask for anything, never expect anything, and to especially believe i never deserved anything! I was here to purely exist and breed. Even my birthday wishes was always something for the family, or for someone else - what little 3yo does that???

So, maybe i need to make a compromise - maybe i need to re-affirm my wish last year - i want completion of what we started, i want a solid financial base that will allow me to take my children where ever i want, when ever i want. I would still be somewhat happy to be restricted by time constraints (happens when you have all these kids and a partner) but i would like to remove fiscal constraint from the picture... i don't want oodles of money, just enough to be able to live a little, and thankfully what i do i can pick up and take anywhere with me...

Of course, migrating to the Northern Hemisphere will put me in a slight quandary... do i stay true to my Australian heritage and continue to follow my wheel of the year, or do i give in and follow the books *nervous swallow*

I'll keep everyone guessing for a while i do believe....