You know the ones - the blah!! days??? LOL
I can wax lyrical about the planets and the way they are aligning is playing havoc with me right now, but i won't...
I've woken up to a news feed on Facebook with much infighting about Autism.
There seems to be a school of thought that it is either genetic, cause solely by immunisation, or just the way God intended. No, i'm sorry, i disagree. I believe it to be a mix of genetic, environmental and fate.
For my personal experience, i can draw it back to the MMR injection for my two children. My daughter, was reading, outgoing, confident before she started school at 4... by the end of her first year of school, she was labelled "illiterate". I didn't know about autism then, much less the link with the MMR, so i left it to the powers that be to guide me without question - this was almost 20 years ago... she was labelled dyslexic, and was provided occupational therapy and speech therapy lessons. They helped a little - the only thing that gave her a marked improvement was me spending countless hours on her case, reading, writing, encouraging, yelling, banging my head, going to this place and to that place to get her confidence and self esteem up... and normally not having much success if the teachers at school weren't as vigilant. My daughter had 4 or 5 supportive teachers during her entire scholastic life. She was assessed for ADD when she was 10, it was positive and she was placed on Ritalin, which was very expensive at that time and made little impact on her.
Then my son was born, one marriage, two more children and16 years later. He made all his milestones a little slower than my previous three kids, but was still considered normal to fast. He loved to sing and dance and knew the words to many Wiggles songs, and the movements. With each of his injections - 2, 4 and 6 months - he became very sick, fever, lethargy, he would just lay there for a week. I would go back to the doctor and i was told i was just being overprotective and to give him panadol. I would reaffirm i have three previous children who never got sick with their needles, and i would just be dismissed. His MMR was horrible. Within 2 hours he was lifeless on the lounge, and there he stayed for two weeks. No doctor would help - i knew he was in trouble. My son literally disappearred before my eyes.
It hurts me to see people totally discount the MMR as a factor, when i have seen it's effects first hand. I call that ignorance; i also call it fear!
My youngest two children are born 10 months apart, or 44 and a half weeks to be exact. I don't compare my children - i grew up in that type of environment, it isn't healthy, so i refuse to do it. But when your baby is totally leap frogging the older child, you would be very irresponsible to disregard it. When Connor turned 2, i wanted to get his hearing checked - just to see. The opposition i received from my family was immense, so i made a deal - i said if he was not any better at 3, i was doing it my way, with support or without. Three came and i made his hearing appointment.
He couldn't complete it - he had a vocabulary of 30 words, and that was being generous - the average for a child his age was 500 - 1000 and could follow simple instructions. Connor just looked blankly as if you were speaking in Swahili to him. He was referred onto speech therapy for assessment. In the session he had an aversion to eye contact, was very pedantic about the colour arrangements and size order, and was difficult to understand and to speak. My then husband was with me, Connor's father, and he didn't know what to think, he was just listless. The therapist looked at me and said i don't think i need to tell you - i looked at her and said it's Autism isn't it, to which she nodded and said we will get him assessed to make sure.
The only time i had heard of autism was Rain Man - i was terrified. I will admit though, i got a great satisfaction looking at my family and saying "I told you so! NEVER EVER tell me i am wrong when it comes to my children again!"
However it was short lived when he received his official diagnosis of mild ASD, mild global developmental delay and severe language delay. I was given a sheet of paper my arms length long almost and was designated who to contact to organise services. My developmental paediatrician is amazing - she was so supportive to me, but the process was still mountainous. My husband wasn't a resident of the country you see and i had to do everything on my own. With five kids in total. It was very tough going.
Somehow i did it, but not without slipping into a very deep depression. And sadly, i admit, the thought of taking my own life did cross my mind. Twice. The first time, i was in conversation with someone online and had gone BRB - i deemed it to be rude if i didn't return. The second time my ex husband was telling me how to make sure i do it properly. This is one of the reasons he is my ex. Connor is very aware, he came and banged on my locked door and sad "Mummy, i love you, i want a hug!" Impeccable timing with a certain knowing.
Physiotherapy was the first "normal" therapy we attended. He was also undergoing crystal therapy at home with me, and i used flower essences, both were wonderful for him and he made remarkable improvement. I refuse to put any medication within his body if i can avoid it. He really did not enjoy physio, not at all, and he for the most part was not co-operative. He also attended blocks of speech therapy, and because i do live on welfare, they were amazing and gave me heaps of things to do at home to help. I learned how to construct storyboards so he could communicate and was introduced to the PECS system. In simple language, its the use of picture cards to support language because they are visual learners.
I was also able to attend, through Mission Australia, a special support playgroup, run for specifically autistic children, and it also had a social worker for support of the parents, to teach them how to cope, to educate and support each other, a place to vent and be heard. They were life savers to me. It was limited to 8 children, and i made a few wonderful friends through the process. Through them, i attended a Makaton course - sign language. It uses signing as a support for laguage - you MUST speak and sign for it to be effective; and it was - his speech came along so fast! I also qualified for the Building Blocks programme run by ASPECT, and Michelle, my therapist, was also a wealth of strength and support for me. I was so blessed to be put in touch with the right people at the right time. Connor was fully toilet trained towards the end of that year, at just over 5 years of age.
It wasn't always positive for me however. The blood testing for Connor, to see if there was any sight of genetic malformaty, and to test his lead levels (which i thought was strange at the time too - this is when i started peicing my own theory together) was the single most horrifying part of all of this. His cries of "I'm sorry Mummy, what did i do? I'll be good! It hurts Mummy!" had myself and the pathology staff in a flood of tears. I don't think i have ever felt more helpless and out of control in all my life.
Then there was the Early Intervention supplied by the Dept of Education. To say i have a love/hate relationship with them is a gross understatement. They refuse to see that i actually operate with some capacity of brain function, therefore i have no issues in making sure they are given the full brunt of my displeasure with them! I also do it with a calm voice, a smile, and a courteous manner! I will contine to fight for my child's right for a decent education for the rest of my days - we have a review coming up in a few weeks, and again that is going to be an entertaining meeting. I have the full support of Connor's wonderful teacher to really make life interesting for them! She is actually looking forward to the meeting because what i wish to know, so does she now LOL
I don't blame anyone for how my son is. Getting an answer will never change the fact he is who he is now. I resent generallising and broad sweeping statements when it comes to Autism. I also have another theory too, which i will post at some point.
I believe these precious babies have very delicate systems that react adversely to metals and chemicals in our environment. So that comes back to science and genetics - simple really! They have a severe allergic reaction to what is about them, and for my kids, that needle was the final shove. Why did it effect two and not all five, i have no idea - but i also refuse to get my youngest daughter the school entry MMR. Not everyone is so lucky - yes, i consider myself lucky i have a moment i can place it on. But not everyone has that luxury. I wish i could give a single reason why, but as each and every person is individual, in their bodies, thoughts, feelings etc, then everyone is going to have an individual response to life when it impacts on them one way or another.
The reason i am so honest with my writing is because i don't want anyone to come under the misguided notion that all "warrior mum's" do not know how it feels to be despondant, hopeless and over whelmed. The difference between a warrior mum and the others is we are not afraid to show our weaknesses, they actually illustrate our great strengths, and shows we also are human, and have made mistakes. We are just as lost as everyone else.
But we face everyday with an undying support for out children to become the very best they can. To me, Connor being able to feed himself, dress himself and tie his shoelaces is my next challenge. He's now 7, and he is about the same level as a 5 year old, but he is coming along. My patience in him growing up is pretty much limitless - i have my bad days, as i will share, but for the most part, my beautiful boy shows me there is triumph in the littlest, silliest things.
And, i love him, and my children so.
They are my world.
I can wax lyrical about the planets and the way they are aligning is playing havoc with me right now, but i won't...
I've woken up to a news feed on Facebook with much infighting about Autism.
There seems to be a school of thought that it is either genetic, cause solely by immunisation, or just the way God intended. No, i'm sorry, i disagree. I believe it to be a mix of genetic, environmental and fate.
For my personal experience, i can draw it back to the MMR injection for my two children. My daughter, was reading, outgoing, confident before she started school at 4... by the end of her first year of school, she was labelled "illiterate". I didn't know about autism then, much less the link with the MMR, so i left it to the powers that be to guide me without question - this was almost 20 years ago... she was labelled dyslexic, and was provided occupational therapy and speech therapy lessons. They helped a little - the only thing that gave her a marked improvement was me spending countless hours on her case, reading, writing, encouraging, yelling, banging my head, going to this place and to that place to get her confidence and self esteem up... and normally not having much success if the teachers at school weren't as vigilant. My daughter had 4 or 5 supportive teachers during her entire scholastic life. She was assessed for ADD when she was 10, it was positive and she was placed on Ritalin, which was very expensive at that time and made little impact on her.
Then my son was born, one marriage, two more children and16 years later. He made all his milestones a little slower than my previous three kids, but was still considered normal to fast. He loved to sing and dance and knew the words to many Wiggles songs, and the movements. With each of his injections - 2, 4 and 6 months - he became very sick, fever, lethargy, he would just lay there for a week. I would go back to the doctor and i was told i was just being overprotective and to give him panadol. I would reaffirm i have three previous children who never got sick with their needles, and i would just be dismissed. His MMR was horrible. Within 2 hours he was lifeless on the lounge, and there he stayed for two weeks. No doctor would help - i knew he was in trouble. My son literally disappearred before my eyes.
It hurts me to see people totally discount the MMR as a factor, when i have seen it's effects first hand. I call that ignorance; i also call it fear!
My youngest two children are born 10 months apart, or 44 and a half weeks to be exact. I don't compare my children - i grew up in that type of environment, it isn't healthy, so i refuse to do it. But when your baby is totally leap frogging the older child, you would be very irresponsible to disregard it. When Connor turned 2, i wanted to get his hearing checked - just to see. The opposition i received from my family was immense, so i made a deal - i said if he was not any better at 3, i was doing it my way, with support or without. Three came and i made his hearing appointment.
He couldn't complete it - he had a vocabulary of 30 words, and that was being generous - the average for a child his age was 500 - 1000 and could follow simple instructions. Connor just looked blankly as if you were speaking in Swahili to him. He was referred onto speech therapy for assessment. In the session he had an aversion to eye contact, was very pedantic about the colour arrangements and size order, and was difficult to understand and to speak. My then husband was with me, Connor's father, and he didn't know what to think, he was just listless. The therapist looked at me and said i don't think i need to tell you - i looked at her and said it's Autism isn't it, to which she nodded and said we will get him assessed to make sure.
The only time i had heard of autism was Rain Man - i was terrified. I will admit though, i got a great satisfaction looking at my family and saying "I told you so! NEVER EVER tell me i am wrong when it comes to my children again!"
However it was short lived when he received his official diagnosis of mild ASD, mild global developmental delay and severe language delay. I was given a sheet of paper my arms length long almost and was designated who to contact to organise services. My developmental paediatrician is amazing - she was so supportive to me, but the process was still mountainous. My husband wasn't a resident of the country you see and i had to do everything on my own. With five kids in total. It was very tough going.
Somehow i did it, but not without slipping into a very deep depression. And sadly, i admit, the thought of taking my own life did cross my mind. Twice. The first time, i was in conversation with someone online and had gone BRB - i deemed it to be rude if i didn't return. The second time my ex husband was telling me how to make sure i do it properly. This is one of the reasons he is my ex. Connor is very aware, he came and banged on my locked door and sad "Mummy, i love you, i want a hug!" Impeccable timing with a certain knowing.
Physiotherapy was the first "normal" therapy we attended. He was also undergoing crystal therapy at home with me, and i used flower essences, both were wonderful for him and he made remarkable improvement. I refuse to put any medication within his body if i can avoid it. He really did not enjoy physio, not at all, and he for the most part was not co-operative. He also attended blocks of speech therapy, and because i do live on welfare, they were amazing and gave me heaps of things to do at home to help. I learned how to construct storyboards so he could communicate and was introduced to the PECS system. In simple language, its the use of picture cards to support language because they are visual learners.
I was also able to attend, through Mission Australia, a special support playgroup, run for specifically autistic children, and it also had a social worker for support of the parents, to teach them how to cope, to educate and support each other, a place to vent and be heard. They were life savers to me. It was limited to 8 children, and i made a few wonderful friends through the process. Through them, i attended a Makaton course - sign language. It uses signing as a support for laguage - you MUST speak and sign for it to be effective; and it was - his speech came along so fast! I also qualified for the Building Blocks programme run by ASPECT, and Michelle, my therapist, was also a wealth of strength and support for me. I was so blessed to be put in touch with the right people at the right time. Connor was fully toilet trained towards the end of that year, at just over 5 years of age.
It wasn't always positive for me however. The blood testing for Connor, to see if there was any sight of genetic malformaty, and to test his lead levels (which i thought was strange at the time too - this is when i started peicing my own theory together) was the single most horrifying part of all of this. His cries of "I'm sorry Mummy, what did i do? I'll be good! It hurts Mummy!" had myself and the pathology staff in a flood of tears. I don't think i have ever felt more helpless and out of control in all my life.
Then there was the Early Intervention supplied by the Dept of Education. To say i have a love/hate relationship with them is a gross understatement. They refuse to see that i actually operate with some capacity of brain function, therefore i have no issues in making sure they are given the full brunt of my displeasure with them! I also do it with a calm voice, a smile, and a courteous manner! I will contine to fight for my child's right for a decent education for the rest of my days - we have a review coming up in a few weeks, and again that is going to be an entertaining meeting. I have the full support of Connor's wonderful teacher to really make life interesting for them! She is actually looking forward to the meeting because what i wish to know, so does she now LOL
I don't blame anyone for how my son is. Getting an answer will never change the fact he is who he is now. I resent generallising and broad sweeping statements when it comes to Autism. I also have another theory too, which i will post at some point.
I believe these precious babies have very delicate systems that react adversely to metals and chemicals in our environment. So that comes back to science and genetics - simple really! They have a severe allergic reaction to what is about them, and for my kids, that needle was the final shove. Why did it effect two and not all five, i have no idea - but i also refuse to get my youngest daughter the school entry MMR. Not everyone is so lucky - yes, i consider myself lucky i have a moment i can place it on. But not everyone has that luxury. I wish i could give a single reason why, but as each and every person is individual, in their bodies, thoughts, feelings etc, then everyone is going to have an individual response to life when it impacts on them one way or another.
The reason i am so honest with my writing is because i don't want anyone to come under the misguided notion that all "warrior mum's" do not know how it feels to be despondant, hopeless and over whelmed. The difference between a warrior mum and the others is we are not afraid to show our weaknesses, they actually illustrate our great strengths, and shows we also are human, and have made mistakes. We are just as lost as everyone else.
But we face everyday with an undying support for out children to become the very best they can. To me, Connor being able to feed himself, dress himself and tie his shoelaces is my next challenge. He's now 7, and he is about the same level as a 5 year old, but he is coming along. My patience in him growing up is pretty much limitless - i have my bad days, as i will share, but for the most part, my beautiful boy shows me there is triumph in the littlest, silliest things.
And, i love him, and my children so.
They are my world.
You are truely amazing!xxx
ReplyDeletethank you xx
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